Turkish Disdain
by Lauren Nachtyr
Summary: Back in the days of Wammy's, Mello awakes one morning to find, in a most humorous way, that Matt has begun a new hobby: cosplay.


Mello awoke that morning with a pounding in his head. Game music and Matt's screams echoed faintly throughout his skull as cobalt eyes adjusted to the light in the joint bedroom they shared at Wammy's. "Matt…" he whispered faintly, looking towards his companion's bed. But Matt wasn't there.

"Where is it…I thought there was one here…"

Before the blonde could register the foreign voice something metallic crashed to the floor, and he just about let his bladder release its load on his bed sheets. "Matt! What in hell are you doing?" Feisty with anger, Mello shot out of bed, throwing off his covers. An icy chill ran down his spine but he ignored it.

The redhead looked up at his roommate with a bored, confused stare. "Hm?"

Blue eyes blinked several times before pointing at his friend's head. "W-What's with your hair?"

Red tendrils stood straight up as if gelled into place. It looked like Matt had seen a ghost one too many times. "Dammit…I was hoping to find the goggles before you woke up…" Matt frowned to himself, combing a few fingers through his petrified locks.

"…What are you talking about?" Mello eyed his friend, unsure what 'goggles' and this stupid, new hairstyle had to do with anything. He crawled out of bed, almost tripping on a remote control car left overturned on the floor. "Dammit, Matt, what have I told you about leaving your toys on the floor?"

Ignoring his friend's comments, Matt returned to searching through a toy chest at the foot of his bed. He picked up one item at a time, saying, "No" before tossing it out of the box onto the floor. "Where could they be?"

The last item Matt tossed was a purple bouncy ball that just missed hitting the blonde in the face. He chased the ball angrily before catching it and throwing it at the crown of Matt's head. "Would you listen to me?"

"Ow! Hey, stop that!"

"I was trying to get your attention. What are you doing anyways?"

Matt sighed. He wasn't going to find them with Mello bothering him like this. "If you'd just wait a minute and let me find them."

Pursing his lips, the older blonde crossed his arms, whispering a, "Fine," before making his bed. The redhead yelled, "Ahah!" before Mello could finish.

"So, Tetris-for-Brains, did you find it?"

"That's Reno to you, Cloud," said Matt, deepening his voice to sound older. He affixed a pair of silver goggles to his forehead.

The orange tinted lenses were shiny and eye catching, gaining attention from Mello before he could realize what Matt had been up to. It was all making sense now. The game music, the shouting…how could he forget last nights escapades?

"Matt…" The blonde shook his head several times. "It wasn't enough for you to keep me up all night with that ridiculous game…but now you're-"

Before he could finish, Matt interjected. "Don't you even start, Mello. Final Fantasy XII is the best game I've ever played."

"Uh huh. And you wonder why I call you Tetris-for-Brains…"

Ignoring Mello's insult, Matt continued. "Yeah sure. You're gonna hate yourself when I remind you that you said you'd dress up with me."

Blue eyes went wide a moment as Mello attempted to remember such an agreement. _I said I'd dress up as Cloud? That doesn't sound like me at all._ "You're just making stuff up," Mello declared, placing his hands on his hips.

"Yeah sure." Arms crossed over Matt's chest up until he remembered something and went to search under his bed. The gamer emerged minutes later, holding a crumpled paper to Mello. "Read it."

Mello took the paper angrily before reading the document then crumpling it in a paper ball and storming out of the room.

"See? I told you!" Matt fell onto his bed with a laugh. Hands grasped his belly, afraid that his powerful laughs would cause his stomach to burst from his abdomen. Mello was good for a laugh and especially amusing when he was proven wrong.

Minutes later Matt's laughing fit was interrupted by cold sprits of water that shot at his face. He leapt out of bed, stumbling backwards until his back was to the wall and he slid to the floor. Mello laughed heartily as he emerged into the redhead's vision. His emerald eyes had previously been clouded by the spray of water.

"Oh now _that_ was good." Mello chuckled. He held a spray bottle and a bucket with unknown contents.

"H-Hey, don't get mad at me. You're the one who signed that paper. I have evidence that you agreed to dress up!" Matt wiped his faced with a striped, sleeved forearm, ready to attack Mello when the opportunity came. When the two came to a disagreement, a fight was inevitable and this time Matt was ready to strike.

"Oh Mattie, you're a few steps behind in the game…as usual. Whatever, I agreed to dress up. But I can't be Cloud if you're not Reno." A smirk found its way to Mello's lips as he pointed the bottle to Matt, ready to shoot at point blank range.

"Hey, hey…calm down. This is natural you know…" Matt pointed to his head, and then put his fingers through the greasy locks. "I haven't showered in two days. And I'm not going to for another few days. In a week my hair will be perfect."

"Uh huh." Mello put the bucket at his feet which Matt realized was filled with soap suds and a large oblong sponge.

Mello came well-prepared, he thought faintly. He had to get away somehow. It was in the name of cosplay; he was going to save his hair no matter what. But he had to come up with a plan, a good one, and fast. Matt pressed his palms against the wall and kept his movements to a minimum. "Calm down, Mello."

"Calm? Heh," Mello grinned. "I'm calm, Mattie. Perfectly calm. Now why don't you sit tight a moment and then we'll go to the showers. A nice, _calming_ shower will do that crazy noggin of yours good." A seemingly gentle smile curled into the blonde's features as he raised the spray bottle and misted it over Matt's panic-stricken face.

Mello's smiles were one of the scariest things known to Matt, even scarier than Sephiroth the previous night. _Shiiit…_thought Matt. He wasn't going to get away unscathed.

"Mattie, you know if you go a week without washing I'll kill you. You smell bad enough after two days." Pinching his nose, Mello made a disgusted face. "Like a monkey."

"Hey!" Matt stuck his index finger out. "I don't smell that bad!"

"Uh huh sure."

Gritting his teeth, Matt kicked his foot upwards, hoping to push Mello away. "I've had it up to here with your in-" A large spray of water caught the redhead in the face prior to completing his sentence. "…sults…" Looking towards his kicked leg, Matt realized his foot had struck Mello's hand on the bottle. He had sprayed himself.

Mello lowered the bottle and bit at his bottom lip. A snort escaped him, then another and then another until he doubled over with laughter. "And you…" he laughed. "And you wonder why…." Blue eyes looked towards his roommate before rolling over to laugh again. "Wonder why I call you Tetris-for-Brains. You're such an idiot."

"Yeah, yeah…" Matt wiped his face which was sopping wet. He sat with a long, irritated expression, utterly defeated. "Whatever, I don't care. You still agreed to cosplay with me so I don't care. Maybe I should have you do Cloud in that dress…"

Before Matt knew what had happened he came to with the sound of running water cascading over his head. "Hey, what the…?"

Mello stood over him, soapy hands massaging at the redhead's scalp. "So you finally woke up."

"Hey! Get off of me!" Matt stood up from a seated position on wet tile. He realized he was in the showers with Mello. His worries were quelled when he realized both of them wore their boxers. "Wait, you…and then…?"

"Yes, Matt. I punched you for saying that crap about me in a dress, stripped you and threw you in here. Your Reno hair is no more." Mello put his hands on his hips, content with his win.

"Goddammit…" Matt slunk to the floor. "You're a dick you know that?" He pointed to Mello.

"Shut up Matt." Releasing a sigh, he came closer to his friend. "I said I'd dress up with you. Just get a damn wig or use gel, ok? None of this 'no-bathing' stuff." The blonde scowled as a large smile etched into the gamer's features.

"Thank you!" The redhead jumped at Mello, sandwiching the blonde between Matt and the cool wet tile of the showers.

A light blush colored Mello's cheeks until he pushed Matt away. The redhead was under the spray of the shower water, just where Mello wanted him. "Yeah, yeah. Enough mushy stuff." Mello rolled his eyes, walking out of the showers. "Now finish up, I'm not your nanny."

Matt happily bathed, day dreaming of cosplaying with Mello in the near future.


End file.
